Sunday, February 2, 2014

The Inspiration

It always comes without warning. Just one of those things that happens when you least expect it, and thats oddly the time when you desperately need it.     (Or when you decide two weeks earlier joining a dating website would be a great idea and a  helpful nudge from your best friend totally throws you into a world where subtlety does not pay off and men solicit you for quirky responses from message like "Alright, I totally have a thing for you eyes". ugh.)     When the universe knows your heart is crying for something or someone to help you realize your potential  =  Potential you may have known all along, but required a push outside of yourself to get it out.      
                                                                          And that must have been the moment I saw his smile.

That moment.          right      there    . When my eyes were touring the room and I managed to stumbled upon his and drunkenly decided to stop and smile at him, and wait for one in return.
       And he did.                  And I loved every fucking second of it.         I'll admit, there was a brief rush thinking that the man who I smiled at would just look away, and all that my heart, my creativity, my urges;  all that they desired, would be pushed aside and brushed over.        I was already in love. I didn't know him,      I didn't need to know him.    I just needed that smile. That catapulted me into the evening, and into the weeks to followed.    

You must have assumed: I was curious enough to solicit a friend for a number and seem to have stumbled upon someone who is equally as hungry for a passionate and inspiring love.  Maybe he wouldn't call it love. Maybe other people wouldn't see it as love (I'm sorry but it's pretty obvious I'm mad about him.....)  but I know just by the way he looks at me, how he makes me feel, and how damn easy it is for him to make me smile; that it has to be.            This amazing, inspiring person sums up all that I think is good and wonderful in a human being; he is kind, positive, loyal, honest and  above all: passionate. And he makes me want to be better; to do better, to go out and grab what I want.     Like all I've ever needed to do was to just fucking go for it.           and so here I am.              re-thinking my moves in life.    slowly toying with the idea that he'll be involved in it somehow. that would be nice... magical really.
       But for now, he is my inspiration.